Toronto Mayor Rob Ford Abandons Football Team at Crucial Time

Don Bosco Eagles head coach Rob Ford

TORONTO –  Down a touchdown, with possession in their opponents’ 20-yard line, and 1 minute left on the clock, the Don Bosco Eagles were in prime position to steal a last-minute victory from the Carr Crusaders.  Head coach of the Eagles, Rob Ford, was set to call the next few crucial plays to drive into the endzone.  Shockingly, Ford unexpectedly walked off the field, leaving the Eagles confused and in disarray.  With not enough time left to form a coherent strategy, the team failed to score and went on to lose the game 21-15.

Ford, who doubles as Mayor of Toronto part-time, was later discovered to have traveled to City Hall to attend a council meeting to vote on the redevelopment of the Gardiner Expressway.

Parents were furious.

“Rob needs to get his priorities straight,” said Rob Jenkins, father of an Eagles player.  “The boys needed him the most at this time, and he really let them down.  Whatever he votes on is just going to be come a boondoggle anyways, so why not just stay here where he could have made a big difference?”

Ford was unavailable for comment.

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